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03:40pm 25/02/2007
  I picked a few to talk about this week. First I want to say, it's the same old videos from last week that are still in the top picks. I'm not sure why, they all aren't that good. (With the exception of the Scented one...)

South Central Farm Tribute
http://current.com/watch/15493231?s1=topVids&list=topVidsByAssignmentGroup&filterone=0&filtertwo=0&sid=15493231&fr=4

I suppose my own political views sort of got in the way of me really appreciating this video. However, I will say that the idea of the impoverished people growing their own food and sustaining on their own is very nice. I just thought it was awfully contradictory that they called this urban farm community a violence free place and when the police showed up they were aggressive and fighting with them. Technically, I thought the video was well done. It was shot well. Personally, I don't give two shits about what Darryl Hannah says in relation to this urban farm, so if that was a gimmick they might as well get right of it. That's really all I have to say about this film.

Oh man...Sumo 101...this was a good one
http://current.com/watch/18519681?s1=topVids&list=topVidsByAssignmentGroup&filterone=0&filtertwo=0&sid=18519681&fr=5
I liked this pod. I like it the most because I thought it was simple, concise and informative. I felt like the length was just perfect and the textual information was fit in while we were enjoying the footage. I also enjoy that the filmmaker put the title and his name at the beginning and the end also in Japanese characters. It was just a nice touch.

A Maui Whale Pod
http://current.com/watch/20071490?s1=topVids&list=topVidsByAssignmentGroup&filterone=0&filtertwo=0&sid=20071490&fr=6

You know...this was an okay pod. However, I thought that it looked like something that would air on the travel channel. It was a bit lengthy and I wasn't as interested in hearing the woman from the pacific whale organization speak the whole time. I really was longing for some better footage of the whales themselves. You tell me it's about a Maui whale and I wanna see a Maui whale...this pod should have been called "The Pacific Whale Organization," Pod or something along those lines. There were some nice shots, I suppose saying it looked like it was shot for the travel channel isn't necessarily a bad thing. It just is what it is.
 
     

(kiss me)

 
   
02:20am 02/06/2006
  I'm going to see the movie The Breakup with my mom tomorrow and I'm super stoked. Last night I was totally out of control. I smoked way too many cigarettes that's for damn sure.
I think I probably said some weird shit to people, but I'm banking on the idea that they themselves were trashed and even if they remember they can't hold it against me because they are raging alcoholics like myself. Either way.
Well, nothing else to talk about really. Just saying hello. bye now.
 
     

(14 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
01:09am 26/05/2006
  Oh yeah...for those of y'all that don't know - I'm back in America. I forgot about livejournal for quite awhile.
-a
 
     

(3 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
02:44pm 15/01/2006
  Life in Ireland is grand. My favorite class so far is Irish studies. We have a lecture on Friday mornings and then Gordon, our teacher, takes us out on a little cruise around the Irish country side. This past week we just went around the Burren, where our tiny little college is located. The Burren is fascinating because it looks like no where else on earth - infact it sort of looks like the surface of the moon. You should check it out - of couse I'll have photographs up at some point.
My cottage is about 2 miles from school so I get a nice brisk walk when I come to school. Although it is a bit from school I am closest to the town of Ballyvaughen, by the town, I mean the town square, which is, by the way, adorable. It's a town of 300 people and we have 5 pubs. I think that's awesome. They serve beer at ice cream shops. I think that's funny too.

This weekend, most of the people who are here went on the bus to Galway. Galway is the fastest growing city in Europe, but it still wouldn't compare with even say..Louisville. It was ultra posh though. Tons of people wearing very fashionable clothing and tons of shops with clothing that was too expensive for any of us to afford. However, I got a cell phone here in Ireland that is pay as you go. It is very expensive, and I mean very, for me to call the States, but if anyone would like my phone number, it would be a great deal cheaper for you to call me. Let me know if you'd like it.
We all went to the farmer's market in Galway and that was lovely. The freshest fruit and veg around at very good prices. Perfect for the starving American art student. I stopped at a wine bar in the market and watched people rush about the fruit and the vegetables. I mentioned to my new friend Ronni that Galway felt very "European," and she remarked "well, I wonder why?!" Ha, I guess I still can't believe that I'm over here.
Well, that's it for now I suppose. Take care.
I keep having nightmares about Jonathan Coomer.
Love y'all. Cheers from Ireland.
-a
 
     

(3 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
09:22am 12/01/2006
  I'm in Ireland. I woke up this morning and thought it might have been a dream. I turned on my light and realized `i was still laying in my cute little cottage I had fallen asleep in. My flight took quite awhile. When I got to Shannon I had to make my way towards Ballyvaughen which I found to be quite a task...you know, considering I've never been out of the country and well...I didn't know really where I was going. On one of my stops at the Cliffs of Moher(I recommend seeing this), I had a two hour break between planes. While I was walking around I thought I saw someone that looked familiar...I quickly made myself snap back into reality.."uh ashley you're in Ireland...you don't know anyone here." BUT I DID! Low and behold, Jonathan's cousin Ginger and her Irish boyfriend who are visiting his family right now were right in front of me! Within the first 4 hours of my arrival...smelling bad, tired and flustered I ran into someone from America! Holy crap. Anyway...long story short...I think that's sort of awesome and they gave me a lift to the college! And as a bonus we stopped at a little irish pub and had beers before they dropped me off. It was awesome. Yeah..so miracles can happen.

love y'all. cheers from ireland.

PS: Ireland is amazing. It is so beautiful...
It's what I thought it would be and so much more.
Think about how you've always seen Ireland portrayed in postcards and movies....it really is that beautiful. every inch of it.
 
     

(3 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
11:20pm 07/12/2005
  It is a good thing that no human being is near me right now. I'm about to shoot something.
aklsjgoaiguy09[auw30-398253gvjdxlvmvdzlgkmselgj
 
     

(3 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
03:48am 27/11/2005
  I want to come home. Literally and figuratively. I need home. I'm so just ready for this semester to be finished. I'm feeling lonely and not inspired lately. Especially when I am lonely, I start reflecting on reasons why I could be lonely. Then I start thinking about all the mistakes I've made. Then I start telling myself that I've learned from them or at least that is what I tell myself.
Being single lately has helped me to just breathe and focus on my work. However, it also has made me a workaholic in some ways and I hope I don't turn into one of those people who just never pays attention to those that they love. I already do it quite a bit with people back home and people that are far away from me. Just not enough hours in the day sometimes.
My nephews are getting bigger and I don't get to watch them grow. Zach seems to remember me everytime I come home. That vacation in florida I spent with him still sticks in his mind.
Okay, so these are a little small, but here is some of the work i've done this semester. these were all shot 4x5. the digital photos from the ride alongs i don't feel comfortable posting on the net...except for one...because no ones face is showing.

Image hosted by Photobucket.com
This is a cops wife that I know. She was awesome.

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A sgt's daughter that I ride with. Ahh the metaphors with this photo.

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this photo isn't color balanced or spot toned. please excuse it. ps: i didn't set that up..it was like that.

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This photo was in a juried show recently.

Yeap that's it
 
     

(1 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
03:43am 27/11/2005
  depression.  
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
04:16am 21/11/2005
 
music: al green - tired of being alone
So I bought my plane ticket to Ireland. Now it seems real. I leave on the 5th of January and arrive in Shannon on the 6th. So beautiful. I can't wait to step out on the emerald isle. I'm going to be photographing Irish cops while I am over there as a continuation of my current project photographing American cops. It will be interesting to see the correlation between each culture.

Christmas break is soon and Thanksgiving is even sooner. I'm going to my friend Erin's house for thanksgiving. Her mom blantatly told me that she was not going to be making a tofurky. erin said that probably means she will be making me a tofurky. either way it will be nice to be with a family.

I want my hair to grow back out. It is too short for my liking. I look like a little boy.
Boys who run off to other states with girls suck. don't ask-- projection of my psychological state right now.
I had fun with my new friend Josh last night. What a cutie...for real.
Booze, snuggles and lovings at Crystals..always fun.

okay I think I am finished. I don't say anything worth while anymore.
 
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
09:31pm 14/10/2005
  line dancing, calf roping...what more could you ask for?
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Image hosted by Photobucket.com


HAPPY BIRTHDAY PATTI
 
     

(3 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
01:27am 12/10/2005
  I was accepted in to the Burren College of Art for study abroad next semester.
After Christmas....I'm living in Ireland. holy shit.
 
     

(7 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
07:40pm 06/09/2005
 
mood: nervous
I had critique today. I rode with a sgt. last night. He was great. I have two more cops lined up that are going to let me take portraits of them and their families. Unfortunately, this project is going to suck the life out of me. But of course it wouldn't have a snowballs chance in hell unless it did.
I almost broke down and cried like 20 times today. Seriously. Depression is kicking my ass. The only thing that makes me happy is order. Like tonight for example...leading the photo club meeting...i felt like everything was outlined and mapped because I had thought about it over and over. Normally my photography would make me happy, but Gene(being the wonderful friend he truly is...and that really is *not* sarcasm) challenged my proposal. That was the first time I was on the verge of tears. I ran into Katherine's office and she told that he had struck a nerve...and that was good...that meant that I was truly heart and soul about these photographs. But still...it threw me out of my orbit. Suddenly something that I fret over all the time, outline and reoutline...sketch and resketch...and research constantly was challenged.
Christ, I've barely started this project and I'm emotionally involved. I guess I was before I started it. Perhaps since I was born.

I just want to go to sleep for long long time.
I need to smile. The nightmares are increasing.
 
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
the weather is here, wish you were beautiful ;)   
03:10pm 29/08/2005
 
mood: slow
music: ellan typing next to me
MCAD crew 2005 officially over.
Classes start tomorrow for me and in the mean time I am organizing my apartment and planning photo club shiznit.
Frank Gohlke, September 15 at the Minnesota Center for Photography...ahhh yeah. AND the faculty show at MCAD opens the next day
AND the black and white artists ball is the next day.
PS: I have a hot date for that.

Too bad I'm going to kick ass this year in the merit show. Advanced photo tomorrow - I've already decided I'm going to rock that shit like no other.
I have too. If I don't strive for the best, why am I here?

Okay, tootles.

cupcakes,
a
 
     

(1 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
01:54am 22/07/2005
  Things I am happy about and in love with(in no specific order):
my dog, god she's awesome
mike and lorrie
patti
my darling, tony
my 4x5 camera
my job, despite how much i bitch...nothing beats hanging out with critters all day
mcad
my family
my fat nephew
my skinny nephew
this summer
the hardwood floors in my room
the shape of my room
jonathan
izzy
the white girl kitten at work that i want
watching movies, ordering pizza and making love
bubble baths
cairo
laura
sara
laura's horse bailey...she reminds me of myself a little bit
starbucks frappacino
all my mcad friends, no matter how upset i get when they are bad at returning phone calls when i'm not in minneapolis
minneapolis - seriously, the most clean city i've ever been in
kat
zac, even though he doesn't like me anymore
my chinchilla, rocket, that tomas is taking care of
the following professors:
katherine turczan
angela strassheim
rik sferra
..they never have stopped believing in me...they're amazing people and incredibly talented photographers...i bow to them


oh there's more i'm sure, but those are the things i've been laying around thinking about
this summer has been amazing. thanks to all of those who have made it...
i heart you, t-money (oh look, a "ha-ha,")

cupcakes(with rainbow chip icing...that's another thing I love),
-a
 
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
You better kiss me, cause you're gonna miss me when I'm gone...nah seriously.   
02:57am 06/07/2005
  Some people just know how to throw all the right fuckin punches don't they?

It is hard..it is hard when you care about people...someone. It's hard when you give everything that you have because you believe in it. Only to feel as though your influence in their life means nothing. When...to you, they mean everything.

It is no secret that I struggle with a bit of depression. It seems to run in my family. I am lucky...it is not as severe as my darling brother's anxiety and depression. Never the less, every morning, I wake up and I decide whether I will be happy or not. I decide whether I am going to have a good day or a bad day. In many ways, I also decide whether I will let someone else have a good day or not. I can be..difficult.
Most days, are really good days.
Thanks to someone very special that unfortunately is not in my life anymore, I have learned that you should not take anyone or anything for granted. I used to spend my depression(that I project through a nasty attitude) freely on those I care about. Not anymore. I am grateful for those in my life that care about me. I'm not perfect, but I try to be the best person that I can be. Nothing more and nothing less.

I guess that the point is that I try so very fucking hard. It is really shitty when you do the best that you can for someone because you love and you care about them. Then you feel like nothing that you do matters at all to them. Even when you think that it might all be okay ...it's word of mouth of stupid livejournal entries that break your heart. I swear this thing is so stupid I should just stop writing right now....
but I have to vent..
ha...so typical.

I have also learned that I have to take care of myself. I cannot keep crying and I cannot be let down over and over. My expectations are not ridiculous. They are normal. To love and be loved. To be appreciated.

Just some advice to my dear friends: you really don't know what you've got till it is gone. I learned that the hard way and truthfully I am not sorry I did now. But I went through a lot of fucking heartache.
And remember, one person that loves you and thinks the world of you is better than no one.

love,
ashley
 
     

(kiss me)

 
   
02:35am 22/06/2005
 
mood: calm
music: sophie's snore
Yo
I've just been working the past two days. Pretty mundane. In fact, everything would be completely normal if I hadn't been totally swept. Thanks for that.

Lorrie, Laura and I rode Laura's horse Bailey today. She was a doll. We gave her a bath afterwards. I was covered in dirt, but whatever. We're going to take the big girl camping sometime next month and run her through the country. I'm really excited. Besides the literal pain in the ass of riding a horse, it's really liberating. They sort of glide and fly through the air.

Saturday was the best night of my life. Hands down. It's weird because it was so completely beautiful that it is hard to even think about putting it into words. It just wouldn't do the entire 9 hours of bliss justice. And to be completely honest, I don't really want to talk about it. It's important to me, it is private. I just had to say that in my 20 some odd years, this past Saturday the 18th of June was no lies..the best night of my life.


Sometimes the stars align just perfectly, do they not?
You are the most beautiful boy.


cupcakes,
a
 
     

(1 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
taking pictures...cause that's what i do   
06:33am 14/06/2005
  Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Sophie, the big silly dog. She walked around with that thing on her face for like 5 minutes. It was hilarious

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Get it, Elton John.

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I don't know either, but it was funny...

so freakin handsome
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
(PS: I cut myself out because I looked stupid basically. Ha)


And...life is wonderful.(Obviously!)
Canada or Mexico, Mr. Ash?

I love living for today.

-a
 
     

(8 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
i like to eat eat eat epples and baneeeeneeees   
05:44pm 12/06/2005
  God, I love to sneeze...just sayin.

Lately, I've been busy and happy. It's a good combination.
Tonight, I'm going to Jonathan's house.
Happy Birthday, Jonathan
Hopefully, picking up Tony to join us and Patti as well if she wants to come.
It's raining outside. It sounds beautiful, it smells even better.
I really would love to just get naked and dance in it. No joke. I don't want to be arrested tonight though.
Last night, I had a dream I was on a boat with my friend Mackenzie. We were going down a river and as we went down the river the seasons kept changing. And there were castles everywhere. It was really beautiful.
That's it.

Tony Ash is adorable...just sayin.


cupcakes,
a
 
     

(kiss me)

 
   
02:58am 09/06/2005
  I am a lucky girl.  
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
03:18am 07/06/2005
 
mood: thoughtful
music: pearl jam - black
I am such a confused little girl. You know what my problem is? I think about things way more than I should.
I don't want to talk about that though. I don't want to talk about it because there's no reason I should be analyzing what has happened to me in the last five days. I have been so happy since Thursday. Thanks to a monster Patti created. I now come complete with jitters and butterflies. I tend to think that the universe is against me and that any care or emotion that I feel comes with a warning label. I can't do that anymore. I've beat myself up way too long. I have to relax. One day at a time......
bashful boys make me giddy.

i gotta steal this one from my katkat...

cupcakes,
-a
 
     

(8 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
good poem   
02:44am 24/05/2005
  this is such a brilliant poem
"FOR THE ANNIVERSARY OF MY DEATH"
by W.S. Merwin
Every year without knowing it I have passed the day
When the last fires will wave to me
And the silence will set out
Tireless traveler
Like the beam of a lightless star
Then I will no longer
Find myself in life as in a strange garment
Surprised at the earth
And the love of one woman
And the shamelessness of men
As today writing after three days of rain
Hearing the wren sing and the falling cease
And boding not knowing to what
 
     

(kiss me)

 
   
08:14pm 29/03/2005
 
mood: calm
Spring is here and everything is blooming. I suppose I am blooming and starting anew as well. Colin and I are doing well and life is treating me decent - I have wonderful friends and a great family. I am blessed. With this new spring I think something very important has happened to me. I think that I've matured into a part of myself that accepts things for the way that they are. I am not candy coating things and when something recently that should have been devastating to me occurred, I took it pretty damn well and decided that shit happens. Welcome to the real world.
Excuse me, but I must take on drama for a moment...
I am not in the market anymore for friends that don't defend me when I would defend them with my life. When I am told I am a "bitch," or a "daddy's girl," from a friends boyfriend - I wonder, "where did he get that information?" I would never in my life ever let someone I love be talked to that way. Excuse me also for being judgmental, but I would never date anyone that talked to my friends that way. Who's to say that he wouldn't talk to me that way? It all seems pretty cut and dry to me. It's bros before hos right? Unless I thought I was marrying that guy or doing something equivalent or better than a lifetime of friendship(I can't imagine what would be better...?) than I would consider giving up a friend...not only that..one of your best friends for a mate to be a preposterous idea. That's just me though. And I'm just fine..
So many times I have thought of writing a letter to say just what I think. I'm so over it though..
This is what I mean..maybe it's cynical, but I see it as just moving on and not dwelling on things.
You understand right? I have to take care of myself.

Love to all my sweeties.
xo
-a
 
     

(6 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
03:09am 16/03/2005
  I wouldn't normally quote a song like this. It's not my kind of music, but I just heard it on the radio and it reminded me of someone...
"Don't waste your time on me, you are already the voice inside my head."

love to patti. xo
 
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
11:00pm 06/03/2005
  Image hosted by Photobucket.com
Image hosted by Photobucket.com
My little baby, she kills me. So cute
 
     

(10 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
03:04am 23/12/2004
  I bear such a striking resemblance to my mom when she was my age. tee hee.


Happy whatever you celebrate.
love,
ashley
 
     

(5 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
06:02pm 16/10/2004
 
mood: cheerful
music: Rilo Kiley - It's a Hit
So happy sooo happy.
Namaste loves,
I've had an awesome last couple of days. Colin and I are still taking it slow and seeing how things are going, but they're heading in a good direction I think. We are both very busy getting shit done for school, but we spend a lot of our free time together and with mutual friends. Friday morning he made me breakfast and made me a warm bath in his freestanding tub. It was so sweet. With no hope of getting in it with me either. Such a gentleman.
Colin and I sat for a friend of ours for some photographs. I was going to scan those photos..they're pretty hilarious. Colin has this stern, angry look on his face and he's like the warmest, silliest person ever so it just looks really funny. And I'm laughing holding a cigarette. They're bizarre.
Anyway, I'm totally rambling.
Colin and I were totally caught by his roommates slow dancing in his kitchen last night to some rather incriminating music. Hah, so dorky cute.
 
     

(1 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
04:37pm 12/10/2004
 
mood: cheerful
music: hum of the computer lab
I don't have too much time to write, but I'll say a little bit. Things have been going really well. I finally got access to the slaughter house I want to take photographs in which is a huge deal because they never let anyone in slaughter houses to take photos. I went this weekend and it was pretty rad. I thought being a vegetarian it would be hard, but I think it might be easier because I don't have to think about eating the meat. Also, next Monday the 18th they told me I could come back and take photographs while they're actually slaughtering the animals. That might be a bit difficult for me, but I'm going..I'll do it. I'm shooting 4x5 and medium format in addition to digital on my rebel.
On the social front. I've been spending mad time with a fabulous little Irish boy. He's a photographer here at MCAD as well and it seems to be working out really well. We're taking it slow and just seeing how things unfold. His name is Colin. God, that's cute. Sometimes I just think about how I like to say his name cause I like that name so much. haha. It's just nice. We have tons to talk about, we make each other laugh and I'm pretty sure it's mutual...we make each other happy. There's a connection..finally. A connection with someone again..a true one. Anyway, I'm back to class to view a demo on sequencing photographs. We just made a huge mural print. I get to make one here soon. I hope the bloody carcass of the slaughter house in 30 by 40 or whatever it is doesn't gross everyone out too much. haha..
blessings my loves,
a
 
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
12:40pm 05/10/2004
 
mood: busy
Long time no write....
Hope everything is going well for everyone. Lots of stuff has been going on in my life and I'm a super busy girl. I hate boys more than anything and I think I'm truly going on strike from them for quite sometime. I've found myself increasingly more interested in interactive media and then including my photography into it. I'm going to take some graphic design and interactive courses next semester just to see how I enjoy it. I feel like I can't make up my mind. People my age will live to be in there 100's probably and they're asking us to make a decision at 19-20 for the rest of our lives until we die. So silly.
For anyone who is close to me that I haven't talked to lately: a lot of shit has changed in the past couple of weeks. I don't really feel like typing it on my livejournal so if you're concerned call me or something. Don't be alarmed though. I seem to get myself in the same stupid shit all the time.
School is going good, but I am so busy and like I mentioned earlier I keep swaying back and forth with what I want to do. Photography is my baby, but I'm really thinking about doing something that combines photography and other medias together. Yesterday was Crystal's birthday. Patti's bday is coming up.
Dear Peter - I will call you back soon. Thanks for calling me. xo


just something i wrote..quickly

And you sat there..knowledgable and slightly shifted
I didn't even think you were beautiful, boy...
you lured me in then made me lust and love humanness
I guess I'm not as prude anymore, but that doesn't mean shit to me.
You opened me and I guess I shouldn't be surprised that by opening me you had to cut me.
And you did..
But that's okay because I'm your "pipe dream," and you wanted to "experience," me.
So nasty and filthy.
But that was supposed to satisfy me.
Keep your picnic and your orange skies, boy.
I don't want you or your beautiful sick dreams.
And I don't care anymore that quite simply you "wanted too."
-a
 
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
   
01:49am 25/08/2004
  Dear Katkat,
I'm frustrated and confused. I've been squeezing stitch tight everynight. Thank you. xo
-a
 
     

(2 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
Back in the saddle again..   
02:50pm 21/08/2004
  Namaste
I'm back in Minneapolis and so happy. I am an orientation leader for the new freshman class this year so I got to come early and train all week. The skit we have planned for them tomorrow is more than hilarious. I am STD girl with crabs in the play. It's awesome. It addresses all the issues that you may come across as a college student. It's really humorous. We spent hours practicing it. The crew is a really good, tight knit crew this year and we're all having lots of fun. Today we met with our small groups and answered questions for everyone.
Tonight is cosmic bowling for the kids, but I think I am going to skip out on that because not all of the crew leaders have to go. Sleeping and putting away my shit is on the agenda. Anyway, school starts on Monday - then I'm busy busy busy again. If you want to get in touch with me ..call me. If I'm not around I'll try to get back to you within the next month or so.. Hah. Ah, MCAD life. Back to showing the kids off to another gathering. xo
-a
 
     

(1 dirty,rotten pair of lips | kiss me)

 
 
 
 
 
 
 

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